Another Marriage First

Shortly after getting engaged, my husband and I moved into an apartment together. (And what an adorable apartment it was! I miss it sometimes.) We did this on his birthday, November 7, 2005. Tomorrow night will be the first night we have spent apart since moving in together.

It is said that absence makes the heart grow fonder and I understand the underlying truth in that message. Yet, after hearing stories from friends about how much they missed their spouses while they were away, I have considered it kind of a personal achievement, this streak of unbroken nights.

Achievement probably isn’t the appropriate word since neither of us travel for work, nor do we really have individual lives, so where would we be at the end of the day but next to each other?

I confess now, it is my fault we will be spending the night (probably two) apart. We went on vacation to Oregon a month ago, mostly to the coast, but it was my ambition to spend one day in Portland and see the sights. We did spend a day in Portland, but due to an unfortunately located hotel room and an unadventurous husband, I didn’t get to see any sights save for one, the inside of an Old Spaghetti Factory.

At dinner with Shaun’s family a couple of week’s ago, my mother-in-law and sister-in-law were talking about a trip they were going to take to Portland, and in an uncharacteristic and unexpected outburst, I invited myself along.

I’ve been to Portland several times before, twice with my husband. Our first trip together just a few months after we started dating was to Portland. But while my husband can easily pass up a weekend getaway, I cannot. The lure of something new and different is too great to resist, even though I know when I get there it won’t be new, it won’t be different and I’ll probably just want to go home. I sometimes secretly wish that my husband liked to travel, but in such a scenario, I might find myself in the precarious position of being the reluctant traveler, and I don’t think that would be any better than the current scenario.

I suppose I’ll miss him terribly while I am gone, as I’ve always hated being away from home and now, he is my home. But I can’t keep missing all this stuff I want to see, I just can’t. I figure it’s a good time to test the absence theory and feel better about myself in the process.

Incidentally, when I told Shaun I wasn’t sure if I should go because we hadn’t been apart before, these words rolled quickly off his tongue as if he’d been thinking about it for ages: “I’m sure it will be fine.”

Check Facebook for pics and updates and I’ll see you on the road.

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About suitejen

Writer. Video Editor. Mama.
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